Andrew and his mate Dave were standing at the edge of the pool watching me. I kept fully under the water. "Hey there," I said. I had been chatting to the two of them through the previous week. They seemed like okay guys. Andrew was tall and well built, a bit overly cocky but nice enough under it. His mate Dave was a bit out of condition, but a really nice guy with lovely big dark eyes. They were both early twenties, much younger than me at forty-four."Mind if we join you?" Nah, feel free," I said. Andrew eagerly stripped off and jumped into the pool. Dave looked a bit more tentative. "Come on Dave," I said. "You haven't got anything I haven't seen before."He looked unsure, but stripped anyway and slipped into the pool.I started to swim up and down a bit more, followed closely by Andrew. On my third length I turned and came face to face with Andrew. He was standing grinning at me. "You look very sexy for a woman of your age." Thanks," I replied, "but you really should leave. Juggling “kitchen classroom” time, providing entertainment, and feeding everyone when I can’t get a shopping delivery slot, is stressful. On top of which, teaching my students online is much harder than I’d envisaged. I’m worried that I’m not doing enough and I feel physically sick when I think about grading my GCSE students.And then there’s her. Always on my mind, invading my thoughts.“Picnic time, I think,” says Jim, pointing at Emma’s red face.Emma grins and I nod agreement before fetching plates of pre-prepared food – Emma’s favourites, some bought in advance of the cancelled party, the rest homemade. Emma claps her hands and smiles gratefully while Lucy gets stuck into a fairy cake, licking the icing off first. It’s a lovely moment, captured on camera by Jim to be posted on Facebook and Twitter for the benefit of absent family and friends. It’s not what Emma wanted but she’s having a great day and we’re spending quality family time together. What could be better?Yet, I’m uneasy..
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